Clear Memories

I have been in the process of saving some old family photos by scanning prints and negatives into the computer. I am able to touch up and restore some things that might otherwise have been lost. I have been able to clear some images that were hazy and torn by time and other damage. I used loved the process of working in a darkroom. It was very holy and revealing, both personally and with the images. I was worried that when I switched over to a digital format that it wouldn't have the same power in my life. But it does. Finding lost and peculiar images and restoring them, collecting memories and reigniting old ideas - well it is all there. And the process can be a bit scary too. The picture I found yesterday and scanned is of a field trip of some sort. At first, I assumed it was a church outing. But then I took a closer look and realized it was the start of the fateful 5th grade field trip extravaganza that would include my famous and now infamous tumble down all the steps of the New York City Public library. There I was all happy and dressed up, chubby cheeks scrubbed and smiling for the camera. My mother chaperoned that trip so probably my Dad took the photo before we left.

The dazzling thing about this photo is that when I look at it, I can't really tell you the names of many of the folks with me. The faces are familiar,and Miss McCarty, my teacher is highly visible to me now, just as she was then. But that moment in time, marked by my plunged down the steps, (with a badly bruised ego) doesn't record that I must have shut everybody else out in my embarrassment. How easy it is to shut others off, turn away and get lost in the passing of time. When we are hurt or embarrassed, isolating ourselves is a normal human reaction.

Today I want God to help me rebuild community and to keep me from turning away from others. All too often, we hide because we are embarrassed or hurt, when we really need other people. We chose our own familiar torture to learning something new or witnessing a miraculous welcome. May we all look back and remember that there is no fall, no misstep, no blemish, that God cannot transform, and indeed, is in every moment working to bring life, life and love to all our dark places.