Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Rain and Tears
"So he climbed up a sycamore tree to see him, since Jesus was coming that way." Luke 19:4
I am small and of no consequence
not a glamorous politician, not a religious celebrity
I am reviled since I do the work no one wants to do, am put aside
since they think I am less than them, not worthy.
They call me names, means names, although honest
and I have done nothing but what they do, I do my job.
I wasn't born with wealth or power, I have to work
my family needs me to be faithful and feed them all.
When I go to pray they turn away hiding
murderous looks shielding their children
I remind them of their sin and greed and
they have to hate me for it.
I am up in this tree, peering through green
softly furry leaves, hanging on to hope
since the crowd was so thick and brutal
unwilling to let me stand in front near their wives.
I hear the roar of the people below me the air electric
with anticipation and then there is total silence.
My heart flutters, I start to lose my balance
the eyes of the world are on me and Jesus calls my name.
He stops and looks at me, here in the branches asking me
to come down to let him in to my home.
I fling the doors of my heart open, the whole of my life open
and he leads me home since I cannot see for the tears.
On my darkest day he calls my name, he isn't afraid,
nor repulsed but interested, kind and laughing
like an old friend who loves me best.
I know I have held back because of my hurt and rejection,
like pounding rain unrelenting and so unkind.
The rejection in the religious community and in the press
made me shut my heart and turn away.
The man from Nazareth stopped as I was clinging to life
he paused and took me home when I was blinded by tears and hurt.
My heart is broken open and love burst in and God is my home forever.