Christmas Eve Mary Letter Day 27

In those days a decree went out from Emperor Augustus that all the world should be registered. This was the first registration and was taken while Quirinius was governor of Syria. All went to their own towns to be registered. Joseph also went from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to the city of David called Bethlehem, because he was descended from the house and family of David. He went to be registered with Mary, to whom he was engaged and who was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for her to deliver her child. And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in bands of cloth, and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn. Luke 2:1-7

Dear Aunt Elizabeth,

Well here I am in a strange city, in a less than comfortable place and in labor. I am surrounded by strangers and need to trust that the inadequacies of this place and the unfamiliarity of these people will be sufficient for the child ready to be born. There is no way to stop what is about to happen, although this is not how I dreamed it, not how I wanted it. The wise woken have checked me and said it is early stages, and have gone off to get supplies and help. Joseph is a wreck and his anxiety has rendered him less than useless! The women sent him off to the city to get supplies that they needed and so for a time I am completely alone. In this quiet moment, alone in this odd and unexpected place,  I am so scared! Does God really want this child brought into the world in such a humble state?
I cannot hold back the tears, Auntie, and wish more than anything that Mama was here.

The weather has turned bad as well, the wind is howling and rain is pouring down. I am chilled on the outside and burning on the inside. The pains are regular and intense but far enough apart that they have all abandoned me for now. The only sound is the wind, the rain and the nearby animals who have wandered in for shelter. I so want to be brave and faithful but my resolve is melting away. I want to scream and cry out and I probably can since no one would really hear me right now. I hold in my mind the picture I have of you, so round and happy, near the end of term. Elizabeth, if you can survive this, so can I, with God's help. Oh, but I do hope someone comes back here soon. Pray that I can live through this with some dignity and faithfulness intact. I fear I am weak and not as strong as you are.

All my love always,

Mary